Atom #1: I woke up this morning and couldn’t find one of my electrons.
Atom #2: Are you sure?
Atom #1: Yes, I’m positive.
David, New York
What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
Nathan, New Mexico
“Broken pencil who?”
“Forget it. It’s pointless.”
Anne: What does coincidence mean?
Becky: Funny, I was just going to ask you the same thing!
Why don't cats ever need to go to the eye doctor?
Because they have purr-fect vision.